Interview with Berwick On The Lake residents, Kitty and Jeff Mcallister

Kitty
Our life at Berwick On The Lake is filled with all sorts of things, activities, things like exercise programs that are designed specifically for our age and they work so well. Some of the people in our residence have organized card groups, so I’ve joined a canasta group and Jeff now plays canasta. We’ve gone on trips, we’ve gone on bus rides, and there are just so many things to do inside Berwick On The Lake besides having social time with the people that live here. So the day is filled. By the end of the day, it’s like, oh my goodness, I think I need to sit down. For sure.

Jeff
I find it exceptionally interesting being here and thoroughly enjoying it. The number of fellows that are here, they’ve got interesting backgrounds, really interesting backgrounds. The things they’ve done in their lives and the experiences they’ve had, it’s really an interesting sharing experience taking place. The whole spectrum of people and their backgrounds is really quite remarkable.

I’m speaking specifically about guys at the moment, and I do thoroughly enjoy that. We played billiards the other night, and as a collection of fellows, we are different than our wives, as much as we love our wives dearly, and we have different thoughts and a variety of things, and we’re all collectively enjoying ourselves. There isn’t a person here, male or female, that we don’t enjoy, which is a really phenomenal thing to be able to say.

Covering the age spectrum that we do is really quite a remarkable experience because I never really mentally thought of having conversations and enjoying the conversation with somebody in his 90s. Really, these are excellent, and some of the experiences they’ve learned have been excellent. So all in all, it’s a very, very worthwhile experience.

Jeff
This is going to sound strange coming from me, but I enjoy the exercise program. I really am enjoying that. I’m enjoying playing pool with the guys. In spite of all my mental deficiencies, I’m enjoying learning how to play canasta. The girls are doing a good job at training me.

I think one of the really beautiful things about all of this is that all of us at this age category, and we’re relatively young compared to some of the others, is that we’ve all had lumps and bumps in our lives, but we’ve now managed to share and enjoy and smile and enjoy life and fellowship. So it’s not a collection of strangers meeting strangers.

Kitty
I really like playing cards. I’ve learned to play mahjong with a group of ladies. I really, really enjoy the brain things that they have several times a week in the afternoons, like playing Jeopardy and stuff like that. So it’s all good, and it’s all good fun, and I thoroughly enjoy it.

Kitty
Wonderful. People are so friendly. From the day that we came in, first of all, we were met by what they’re calling ambassadors. The ambassadors, their job is to acquaint us with other people and to make us feel comfortable.

We had already spent several times coming in and out of this building, so we already had a good feeling about it. But then when you come to the dining room, and people are introducing you to other people, it’s amazing that everybody said, "Oh, are you the new person here? I’m so and so." At meal times, you come into the dining room, and if there’s an empty space, you sit down, and everybody welcomes you. So we’ve met so many different and new people, and that’s been wonderful.

The atmosphere is welcoming, it’s comfortable, and of course, all that comes from the philosophy of the whole place, which is that everybody is included and that you meet with everybody. So that’s what. Yeah, it’s wonderful.

Jeff
The staff and the serving side of things and the housekeeping side, every facet, wonderful. The staff are all really, really delightful people that would be welcome in my home at any time. There isn’t a staff member of any area that wouldn’t be welcome in our house and our place at any time for an evening or whatever. They’re all enjoyable, from the cleaning ladies to the management and everybody else in between.

Kitty
Wonderful, caring, friendly. It’s amazing when we go to the dining room and they know your name. It’s personal. Even better, some of the staff that are always on for breakfast, and we go for hot breakfast. Not every place has a hot breakfast, but they do here. You come to the table, they’ve already got your water glass or your juice or whatever, your coffee cup is turned up and ready to go. They know exactly what you want. You just say, I think I’ll have the usual, and they know exactly what you want. They all do everything they can to make you comfortable and happy. Especially our maintenance guy, Keith. If you’ve got a problem with your TV set, he’ll come right up and fix it for you. He does. It’s wonderful.

Kitty
We visited a number of different places before we chose this. The first time when we came to the building, we looked at it and said, "Wow, this is lovely!" Of course, the setting is spectacular. But walking in the front door, it was welcoming to start with. It’s open, and it just welcomes you. Then walking in a little further, there’s so much light and so many windows looking over the dining room and then looking out over the lake. It was like, wow. My first thing was, I’m living here. I’ve already made my mind up. I’m not going anywhere else. I’m living here.

The bonus was meeting people there, going on a tour and talking to different people. We also went to several events we were invited to so we could experience the place. We went to several dinners, and we went to a couple of concert things that were held out on our patio. That gave you another flavor. You could talk to different people. Then they’d say, oh, are you planning on coming here? We’d say yes. They’d say, oh, that’s interesting. Then they start telling you about stuff. So yeah, it was just. That’s the kind of thing it was. So that made us decide.

Jeff
We checked out a number of other places in Nanaimo, and some of them were okay. On a scale of 1 to 10, they would be a 7 type of thing. They were acceptable, but not really something that says, that’s where I want to spend the remaining days I’ve got. But this is just sprightly. It really is. It’s an open, delightful spot. I guess that’s about it. It’s wonderful.

Kitty
Easy, easy. Christine. We had kept in contact with her over probably about a year and a half because we weren’t ready to come in. Then it was, I guess, early last spring, Jeff phoned her and said we would really like to be there by the fall because I don’t want to have another winter in the apartment by ourselves. So she started. We wanted a two-bedroom suite, so she started on that, and then we got a call from her in May and she said, I’ve got a two-bedroom one I want to show you. So she showed it to us and we said, yeah, this works. Space is great, looks fine, great. So we said, okay, we’re coming.

So that was it. To get moved in, we met a lady that does packing and packed everything we needed to pack, and a mover who also lived in our apartment building. They moved us in, and we were in and unpacked by 2 o’clock that afternoon. They started at 9 moving us, and it was all put away. It was one, it was so easy.

Kitty
Pretty well almost immediately. It didn’t take us long, very quickly. I realize that people coming in singly would not have the same experience that we did because being a couple, you’ve got each other for support, and we’re pretty outgoing people to start with. So the ambassador program that they have is really, really important and such a boon for this place because it gets people mixing with other people and not having to wonder, should I go to that table and say can I sit with you people or do stuff?

They just make it smooth. Within a week or so, people are like, yeah, ‘I think I’ve been here for quite a while. I feel like I’ve been here a long time.’ Some people don’t have our experience because we were proactive about coming here. Some people, of course, are in the position that they have to because they can’t manage anymore or their family’s pressuring them, so they aren’t quite so positive. But it doesn’t take very long before that’s turned around, too, because they’ve met people, they’ve got friends, et cetera.

The people in here give you a positive outlook for sure. This whole place keeps you healthy because that’s their business, to keep you healthy. They do. We are well fed. We are fed proper meals, and the fitness programs are designed for different levels for different people, so you can join whichever ones you want or not join them. Then the activities are myriad, craft activities or outings or just to keep everybody busy, movies every night.

Jeff
That’s exactly right. One of the amazing things we see here is there are a couple of women in particular that are close to 100 years of age that are still great, active, friendly. Play canasta with them and stuff like that. They are an absolute delight. It puts a whole focus on the aging process. Where before one thought that, oh my gosh, we’re not that far from walking off the edge. Now, oh gosh, we got another 20 years ago.

Kitty
Get a tour. Number one, talk to people that are here because I wouldn’t know what they were wanting or looking for, but they need to talk to the people that are here. Come to activities that you’re invited to. Christine always has, for example, we have a wine tasting session once a month, and last month we had a couple of people who were looking to come here, and they were delighted to be invited, but also to be able to one-on-one talk to the people in the group. The stuff that was going on in our wine group. So that is a real help for people to make up their minds.

Some people already know people that are here, so that’s also a help too, being a smaller place. But we also do have people that, because their family’s here, are coming from a long way away, and sometimes this will be their first introduction because they’ve had to move from, say, Saskatoon or Toronto or somewhere to be here. But again, the experience is always welcoming.

Kitty
Maybe we haven’t been here long enough. I’m not sure. I have not found anything that was to my dislike or that I thought should be. But we’re always giving Chris, our manager, tidbits about, you know, maybe we need a thing for scraping our feet outside the door, or stuff like that because we don’t want to track muck into the hallways or whatever. But absolutely minor kinds of things that make the place just be better. But majors, no. I don’t think that there’s any major, major thing that I could say should be changed. I haven’t found any challenges, certainly not for myself.

I can’t say that we’ve had any challenges, not personally, and any kinds of suggestions are pretty minor stuff that’s just day-to-day little things, but nothing big.

Jeff
I find that we’ve had our family here a few times, and the hosting process they do for us has just been absolutely wonderful. We brought a series of friends down and had them for lunch or whatever, and that whole sensation, we haven’t had anyone not say, oh my gosh, this is just a delight. So it’s probably on their forethought down the line when they get to our age category.

We’ve got a 15-year-old grandson, and we enjoy having him here. I got him to play pool down on the patio and all sorts of things, so hey, when you can bring a 15-year-old boy into the place and enjoy having him here, that is really something in itself. It really is. You don’t have a grouchy grandson that way.

Kitty
I don’t know. We’re not going to a different community because our kids, our family’s here, and that’s why we moved here. So I think we would probably do exactly what we did, which was to go and look and see what these residences have to offer, what they’re like, and you know right away whether you want to go back or not.

I find it quite interesting because a lot of people here have lived in some of the others and we asked, ‘What have you got to say about them?’ Some of them were not very complimentary. But what are you going to do? You have to go and look for yourself. But the experience that you’ll have coming here and taking the time here, then you’ll know. That’s all I can say. The difference is like night and day. But you have to look at the others, as well, to know.

Jeff
You have to be honest with yourself and go and investigate the other places, one thing and another, so that when you do decide to come to the Berwick, you know you’ve made the right decision. But there are entities where people go in and, for whatever reason, for a sense of urgency or whatever, they commit to it, and then they’re nothing but grouches from then on.

Kitty
You really have to know what you want. The other thing is in this building you can have pets, and there’s some buildings that no, you can’t have pets. We have two wonderful dogs in this building, and we have I don’t know how many cats. The cat stories go round and round, and they’re quite delightful. Of course the cats are house cats, et cetera. But yeah, the fact that people come in and feel comfortable that they can have their little dog or their cat with them makes a big difference because if you can’t, it’s not the place for you.

Jeff
The number of people that are here that are single now because of loss, the demise of their husband or wife, and to fill a void is really something. The hospitality and the friendships and the reach-out that people do to everybody here really makes a huge difference. The ones I see that go through a bit of struggle for the first month or so seem to be those people that have had their own home and they’ve lived in their own home for the last 20, 30, 40 years, and now they’re leaving the neighborhood that they knew and they’re now divesting themselves of their house. There is a real grieving period there, but they soon get over it and they soon really, really enjoy it. I don’t know of anybody that’s said, ‘Oh gee, I’ve got to go back and get my house again!’ or whatever. They just say, oh no, this is good.